Today I woke up in a bit of an icky mood. Aside from the fact that I rose at 5:30 (not willingly) my freshly bathed dog rolled in crap and two giant zits had sprung up like weeds on my face sometime during the night. Fantastic. I thought people my age weren’t supposed to get zits anymore.
With my less than wonderful disposition this morning came the question I ask myself once in a while “Why? Why? Why do I write this blog?” It started as a way for me to post some photos along with a short anecdote I thought one or two people might enjoy. My readership grew (thanks everyone!) a bit and now I feel as if I’ve hit a wall.
I certainly don’t blog for the money. But I WOULD LOVE TO. Yes I would. I would LOVE to promote your newfangled prosciutto and M&M diet, that lovely smelling extra strength hair removal cream for that unkempt bush you keep pestering your Grandma about, or that amazing new children’s clothing line made entirely from recycled aluminum foil. Did I say I WILL PROMOTE YOUR CRAP? I TOTALLY WILL. Would it be selling out? Um, no.
Here’s my dilemma which I’m sure my fellow bloggers can understand. How can I attract more readers to my blog? Aside from tattooing READ MY BLOG on my forehead, I’ve got nothing.
Perhaps I need a gimmick….
Giveaways? A few months ago I tried giving away free egg rolls, but I received a rash of complaints from the winners. Apparently egg rolls do not ship well.
Maybe I should I go with my other idea. I seem to be able to get pregnant pretty easily, so maybe I can get knocked up with 6 or 8 or 10 kids and have the babies LIVE on the Internet. Then I can buy a big bus and travel around and sign autographs like those nut jobs Jon & Kate or that super creepy Duggar family with 18 kids. Yes 18 kids. They are absolute nut jobs (please click on the link so you can see how nutty they really are)
Now I do not live on Fantasy Island and think I can attain super duper queen blogger status like Heather Armstrong over at dooce (a big thank you to some of Heather’s readers for following my site) But for now I will continue to write and hopefully a few more people will find my blog and maybe, just maybe, a giant pile of money with fall out of the sky onto my computer. I won’t be holding my breath though.
16 Comments
Well, I love your blogg. And I can bring you some coins next time I am in CA if you'd like, I have a whole box filled with weird coins from all over the world. Or so it feels… Would that do? If I bring a few different ones we can build a pile
I'm with you! I was just saying yesterday that I wish I could figure out how to make money blogging. Does anybody really make money at it?? And why do so many totally lame blogs have 250 followers when I attract, like, one every six months?
I still think you should try writing greeting cards. You are SO witty and clever. And it pays really well. Meanwhile, I love your blog!
Thanks Anne-Katrin, love reading your blog too.
Coins would be great!
Although you would probably use them all up in those pesky, super expensive parking meters we have here in the city…
I'm with you Leslie. I think lots of bloggers do the "I'll follow you if you follow me" thing and then the followers actually NEVER read your blog again.
Thinking of removing the follow button, still not sure.
Thank you for following AND reading my blog!
I think you're very funny. Is blogging the only writing you do? It shouldn't be. And, yes, I have the same dilemma with how to get followers. I've been on a follower-plateau for ages now. Perhaps the live-birth-on-Internet thing is the way to go, and as I'm 47, that might be of even more interest. To a certain audience, obviously …
These are all questions and hurdles every blogger faces that's worth their salt.
It separates people into the 'make a buck' pile as opposed to the 'I am real' one.
The mere fact you're blogging about it puts you in the latter. Monetizing is a game, it's tough, but in the end it's not what keeps people blogging from their heart or soul.
Would I sell out if I could make a six figure income? Dang right I would! Will I? Doubtful. Until then it's a cool hobby that can be done for some time.
Beats knitting.
You scared me for a second. I thought you were going to say you were calling it quits. I never would have guessed, when I first read your blog (before you had followers), that you were so funny. Making people laugh is a beautiful thing.
As for advice on getting more readers – I'm about the last person who could answer that, but I'm always thankful when someone does read.
Seems the most efficient way to get followers is to use foul language, be mean, and/or be very explicit, or so it seems in Sweden. I'd rather have very few readers than doing that… I'd be lousy at it anyhow…
It may also help to have a really sad story to tell or have children very young and write about it, which is also not for me. So I'll stay where I am. And then there is that chance for other bloggers to advertise their own blogg, that I could possibly do, but chances are just that: They subscribe just to follow and then never checks again…
I'll bring coins
Well Fran, with today's advances in medicine you can totally have 10 kids. Something to think about….
Blogging is currently the only writing I do. Would love to write some other stuff, but I've seem to hit a wall with that as well…
Perhaps I need a helmet.
Sorry LESLEY. Misspelled your name in my above comment. I have probably done it before….
But I think I'll just go ahead and change it to LESLIE for you.
How eloquent John. You're right though, making a buck would be the icing on the cake….
Not sure what I would do to fill my time without blogging. Knitting isn't my style….
ULTIMATE FIGHTING.
Mark – I believe you were the one to make some great suggestions when my blog had about 6 readers….
Thanks for that.
At the very least, you'll have a good archive at which to laugh when you are older and wiser.
Love your blog. I only follow blogs that I actually read. I've noticed when some blogs attract too many followers it seems like the writer starts to pander to the audience.
For a short time I tried to attract more followers, but it just seemed like a game. Like having 5000 "friends" on Facebook and only actually knowing 15 of them. I so can't do the "I'll add you if you'll add me thing" so I'm sure that means I'll be a complete failure in this life. And give-a-ways really turn me off. It seems like trying to buy a friend– like the girl in grade school who would give away her new Strawberry Shortcake dolls so the snotty girls would talk to her. It seems to work in the blog world though if your goal is to gain followers.
C.J. I feel the same way.
Think we have a lot in common….
I know how you feel. That is why I am going to run around San Francisco naked next week with the name of my blog painted on my body. For an extra fee, I could add yours too.