The other day I was standing in my kitchen, chopping onions and “SNAP!” It was my neck. It felt as if a giant ape had …
Vaginas and Vodka
I didn’t know what to expect when I walked into the Hilton Hotel that hot and steamy morning last week. Would I be ridiculed because …
Experiment in Crazy
Tomorrow morning I’m getting on an airplane and flying to New York City. I should be packing right now but I’m overwhelmed by the gigantic …
Tinkle Tinkle
Having lived in the city for ten years now, nothing surprises me anymore. But this was odd. A no peeing sign in front of a …
I’m Free
feet shuffle side to side tap tap tap thump That was me dancing. Then I fell over because I don’t dance. Like ever. Exceptions will be …
Meine Lieben Klaus…
Someone needs to grab me a pair of high waisted acid washed mom jeans STAT. Because…because…because… I am now the proud owner of a station …
I’m Still Here
I really wish I could start off this post with wonderful photos of my recent trip to the South of France or a narrative of …
Basket Case
Yes, I’ve been ignoring the world. I haven’t been posting anything here, there or anywhere. I haven’t been reading your blogs. I’ve been avoiding phone …
Pussy Galore
Yesterday I went out for a stroll with my cat Truffle. We were enjoying the beautiful sunny day. I was listening to my Nigerian language …
Kitchen Nightmares
Sweet kitchen, huh? Tomorrow I will be washing my pots and pans in the bathtub and eating my microwaveable cheddar flavored chicken flavored tofu flavored …
Getting To Know Me
Contrary to what you’ve been reading in all the gossip magazines for the past few weeks, I have not run off with Billy Ray Cyrus …
What A Mess
Here are some very random photos. I’m frustrated because this blog theme appears to be broken and I can’t figure out how to post photos …